Write Down to a Science

Is that...me? (in a possible, distant future?)

2010-09-04T10:56:00.000-04:00

If and when Mrs. and Dr. Scientizzle choose to procreate, I have a feeling there will be scenes in my life similar to this one (courtesy of Awkward Family Photos):

Lemme see here...USC Trojan fan playing an NCAA Football video game whilst feeding the offspring. Yep. Totally plausible future event in my life.

Hell, I do this now...minus the kid, natch.

Happy college football day!

2010-09-02T11:49:00.003-04:00

Those that know me are well aware that I am a college football nut. Although it has been a...ahem...tumultuous off-season for my team, the USC Trojans, I'm looking forward to watching them play. In fact, they play tonight! The Trojans help to open the whole college season, playing their first game at Hawai'i starting at 11:00pm ET.

Eleven o'fuckin'clock, Eastern Time.

Oh, I'm stayin' up to watch, but I'm not sure how long I can last -- I do have to work in the morning...

This is an early example of a cruel reality I learned of last September upon moving to the East Coast: watching college football on television is way more fun living in the Pacific Time Zone. My typical Saturday morning for most of the previous decade:

~8:30am PT - roll out of bed and catch the last half hour of College Game Day
9am - first games of the day begin, usually fairly uninteresting matchups between mediocre ACC teams (but I repeat myself!) or SEC squads playing nonconference games against Northeast Bumfuck State Technical School for the Blind, but perfectly acceptable for a slowly-waking-up-and-possibly-hungover football fan. I usually have at least three channels of games I surf between, an appetizer for the main course.
Bonus: if I happen have recently received a new copy of the latest NCAA Football game for XBox, I'll often update the rosters of the teams I'm watching ad adjust the player ability stats accordingly. ("This Illinois QB can run all over the field, but his noodle arm couldn't hit the broad side of a barn from 15 yards...dexterity set at 85, arm strength dropped to 50!")
12pm - the good games usually start at noon on the West Coast. Pac-10 games start up and the other conferences showcase their better teams. There's usually at least one premier game on at this point, which is helpful when groggy Mrs. Scientizzle finally emerges from bed and makes clear that she's not about to watch something uninteresting. No sirree.
3:30pm - by now I've had brunch and maybe a beer. There's always at least one really good game on by now. The night games from the SEC are about to be showcased and typically a top-3 Pac-10 team is playing.
About now is when one of us has had to move over to the other TV. At this point, one room is broadcasting something from the Food Network, the other broadcasting something that doesn't suck.
7pm - beer is flowing like water; sweet malty, hopped water! The Pac-10 night game has about a 67% chance of featuring my team, USC, and/or Mrs. Scientizzle's Oregon Ducks. There's probably a quality Mountain West Conference game on right now, too, which are often entertaining.
~10pm - gameday is over. But it's still early enough that meeting friends for a non-football-themed outing at a local establishment serving food and libations. And there's no conflict between entertaining games and Saturday Night Live.

Now, even if I sleep in way late, I'm up before games have even started. It's hard to watch Pac-10 games out here without satellite (usually we get stuck with Big ~~Eleven~~ Ten snorefests or Big East super-snorefests with regional distributions); sometimes we're only able to watch USC or Oregon online. And the games get late. Example: Oregon has 7 of 12 games scheduled for broadcast as of right now--4 of these are airing at 8pm ET or later, including the October 2 game versus Stanford at 11:15pm!

And right now, we also only have one TV...you can imagine the consequences, I'm sure.

But it's not all bad...
It's actually much easier to watch English Premier League games out here, and they air just prior to college football, so that's cool. Plus, we live in an area of our city in which we can walk to several local establishments that have multiple televisions and thirst-quenchers on tap. I've also recently joined a coed soccer league that plays of its games on Saturday morning, thus keeping me out of trouble.

Really, though, despite my bitching above, I'm mostly just excited to see the start of another season!

**********

Friday morning update
Well...I made it through the third quarter. I had to turn in at the start of the fourth quarter, approximately 2am ET. USC was up then, 42-23, I think. They won 49-36. Fight On!

Back in the saddle(?)

2010-09-01T13:03:00.000-04:00

This blog had (has?) basically become dormant.
This is not because I lack opinions (FSM knows I don't), personal news, science stories, sports analysis, or amusing anecdotes.
It's mostly because the last year has been filled with transitions.

I gradumanated. Left graduate school and the city I consider my hometown behind to move to the East Coast.
It's been eleven months since I started my post-doctoral research. I love my new job and the science is proceeding well. The Missus and I have kept busy, exploring a new major city, a new state, a new coastline, and there have been many challenges. The weather not least among them. (How the hell do people live in constant humidity?)

We miss Oregon. We miss our friends and families; it can be lonely out here at times. Luckily, we've stayed in touch with a good number of fantastic people we met in Portland, many of whom have already, or will very soon, scattered across the world to pursue their careers and dreams.

I started this blog back in 2004. 2004! That was a different era. "Weblogs" were still kinda a new thing, and I followed on the heels of a few friends that had creatively explored the medium in interesting and amusing ways...

This blog was one of the creative outlets that allowed me to work through the transitions in my life at that time: leaving Los Angeles and my college friends behind, getting married, starting graduate school, being a "grownup."

Whether this space will serve that function as I move on, grow older, remains to be seen. It had been deleted for over a month (you didn't notice?) as I wasn't sure what I wanted to do. Still, it can't hurt to spruce this space up to facilitate a fresher vibe. Spring cleaning in September, if you will. I've altered the layout & design, trimmed links, and dumped Haloscan/Echo comments for just the built-in Blogger comments.

...let's see where this goes.

Spiders. On. Drugs.

2010-02-28T17:46:00.001-05:00

Happy Darwin Day!

2010-02-12T10:51:00.000-05:00

Happy 200th birthday, you ol' bugger!

The clip from Love Line that almost killed me and my wife...

2010-01-03T01:28:00.000-05:00

So...I found a YouTube clip of a Love Line episode that almost killed Dr. & Mrs. Scientizzle a few years back.

It's freakin' hilarious and completely tasteless. Definitely NSFW, too. The reason this clip almost killed us: when it aired, my wife (though we hadn't yet made it legal) was driving the car and nearly drove us off the road. Seriously. She was laughing so hard that she veered hard to the right on a straight road.

It's just the most wrong...heinous even...phone sex evar. EVAR! Click play below to listen to the whole clip.

The "phone actress" is even a complete fucking idiot, too! Tom Arnold as the show's guest is a decrepit little cherry on top of the whole shebang.

Also worth noting: I made the single most uncomfortable Google search of my life as I looked for this clip...I am, no doubt, on some sort of government list as a result of this search (deliberately presented as a very small image that can be expanded upon clicking):

I feel so very dirty (TWSS).

Neural correlates of interspecies perspective taking in the post-mortem Atlantic Salmon: An argument for multiple comparisons correction

2009-10-25T14:33:00.001-04:00

The imaging technology of functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) has given researchers a fascinating view into the working brain. fMRI can measure changes in blood flow within the brain, which is a useful proxy to determine activation of different brain regions in response to various stimuli, drugs, or cognitive tasks.

fMRI also produces a very complex data output. data points in 3-dimensional space (voxels) number in the six figures. Craig Bennet & colleagues argue that many fMRI studies use insufficient statistical methods to limit false-positive reading. That sounds pretty boring; it would be if they hadn't done something amusing to shed light on the situation.

What exactly is on the mind of a dead salmon?

Behold (click in pic for full size):

Yes, that's right...they performed an fMRI on a dead salmon. And they found significant voxels that might be interpreted as active brain regions. Except that it's a dead fish.
It's an amusing way to get attention for a drab sort of problem, and it's received some outside attention.

The Story Behind the Atlantic Salmon presents the, well, story behind the Atlantic Salmon.

The hidden gem in The Office wedding episode

2009-10-14T16:12:00.000-04:00

I cracked up at this scene. The missus didn't seem to notice, nor did she likely know why...

Well, this is why. Dwight wearing this shirt is a direct nod to one of the more amusing internet memes I've come across. Read the over 1500 comments in that Amazon.com review. It's pure concentrated awesome.

2009-10-13T17:17:00.000-04:00

Done.

2009-09-16T20:42:00.000-04:00

I defended my thesis five weeks ago. Today I collected the signatures of each committee member approving my finalized dissertation. I've submitted the document for binding and turned in all relevant paperwork.

It's done. All of it.

So done, in fact, that it's my last day in the lab as well. I've just spent a couple hours clearing up and organizing all my stuff. My desk, my lab bench, my computer: all cleaned off.

I filled the recycle bin with all my notes from every class I've completed in grad school. Wave after wave of classroom memories have filled my head. "Pinocytosis is...non-concentrative in action." "Shrink yourself down to the size of a man." Lotsa inside jokes for me and my 'mates.

It's bittersweet to be moving on. I'm stoked for my new job. I'm cautiously optimistic about a cross-country move. I'm going to miss coworkers, friends and family like hell. Five years is a long time and it isn't. Thank you to all my friends in Portland. Thank you so much.

"Hi...I'm Maurice. I'm an executive by day and a wild man by night..."

2009-09-15T13:50:00.000-04:00

Dating Montage
by smithy00101

"Hi. My name's Monroe. Ah, you've probably already noticed that I have incredibly blue eyes..."

History of 19th-Century Oregon

2009-09-09T13:24:00.000-04:00

Laurelwood Organic Portland Roast Espresso Stout

2009-08-28T22:48:00.000-04:00

The Missus & I shared a 22oz bottle of the Laurelwood Organic Portland Roast Espresso Stout this evening. Laurelwood is one of the many, many local breweries that we frequent, and we've always enjoyed the happy hour and its $3 pints. This particular beer blends organic beer with organic coffee from a local coffee roaster.

You won't find many beers with a richer, darker color: it looks like espresso. It's intensely fragrant, with heavy coffee aromas and malty sweetness. When I opened the bottle, our kitchen filled with these pleasant smells. It pours thick, with a head reminiscent of the edges of a dry cappuccino, appropriately enough, where the milk foam absorbs the rich brown of the espresso below.

What surprised me upon tasting was how dry it actually tasted; the sweetness of the malts was diminutive compared to the acidic espresso flavor, creating a beer that smelled considerably sweeter than it tasted. The espresso is bold and the beer has a smooth mouthfeel, if a bit astringent, with a modest chocolate flavor hiding behind the roast coffee.

The Espresso Stout sports a solid 6.3% ABV. I enjoyed this beer, though I might have appreciated just a touch of additional sweetness to bring out more of the complexity of the espresso. Others have rated it well...I'd give it a 8/10. The Missus? 7/10.

College football is coming soon...

2009-08-23T18:27:00.000-04:00

Let's get the smack started early...

I did it...

2009-08-14T12:31:00.001-04:00

I successfully defended my thesis on Wednesday.

I feel a little different now -- mostly I'm back to my relaxed, laid-back general state (as opposed to the generally tense and sleep-deprived state of the last couple months). It's still a bit surreal, frankly.

I've got work yet to do: all six members of my committee have provided me with critiques and criticisms to address while revising my written thesis. However, each one of them checked the "satisfactory" box on the super-important piece of paper I handed into the graduate school office.

What up, world. I'm a doctor now!

Sports Meltdowns, Remixed

2009-06-23T11:50:00.000-04:00

Allen Iverson, Jim Mora, Dennis Green, Mike Gundy, Joe Namath, and Terrell Owens have never been so entertaining!

Alcohol reduces gallstone risk

2009-06-01T15:14:00.000-04:00

Beer gets another check mark in the plus column! Drinking a moderate amount of alcohol protects against the development of gallstones.

I'll take an Oak Aged Yeti Imperial Stout, if you don't mind...

2009-05-31T12:40:00.001-04:00

see more Funny Graphs

2009-03-24T20:43:00.001-04:00

Facepalm: free antibiotics, what could possibly go wrong?

2009-03-05T16:29:00.000-05:00

My wife sent this to me today: "Free antibiotics may have high cost later"

Apparently, a few supermarket pharmacy chains have been giving away free antibiotics. The CDC caught wind of it, went "Bwaah?!?", and sent off stern letter stating Knock It Off!

Several pharmacies have been offering the free antibiotics--some only for the winter season and down economy, others year-round--to those with valid prescriptions for said antibiotics. Experts are worried that this will encourage misuse of these drugs and further requests for these prescriptions even when unnecessary; a British Medical Journal study from last year indicated that 13 percent of doctors reported using antibiotics as placebos! Often patients insist on antibiotics to treat viral infections, like influenza, for which antibiotics cannot be effective.

For those who aren't aware: antibiotic resistance is a big problem. Antibiotics, generally prescribed to treat specific bacterial strains, are rendered completely ineffective on those that develop resistance. Bacteria get a push towards drug resistance when antibiotics are used improperly or unnecessarily.

I honestly can't believe that there are still practicing physicians that will prescribe antibiotics to those that don't need them. It's beyond stupid. I'd argue that it's enough of a public health concern that doctors caught doing this should have their licenses suspended. Seriously, grow some stones and explain to the patient why it's a bad idea.

Anyways, back to the pharmacies...what they're doing may have been well-intentioned (although a cynical angle represented in this story explained how it's a clever marketing ploy), but it's clear that it may have negative consequences. I wonder if the pharmacists employed by the chains in question registered any concerns about the promotion. However, I will stick up for the pharmacies a bit here for a general reason: they're not responsible for the prescription practices of medical doctors. At the rick of soapboxing again, if 0% of doctors prescribed antibiotics when medically unnecessary, a free antibiotics promotion wouldn't be a problem at all. Hopefully stories like this will continue to shed light on the problem and change relevant behaviors.

...I can dream, can't I?

NCCAM and American health care

2009-03-03T14:55:00.000-05:00

Senator Tom Harkin (D-IA) isn't happy...His pet project, the National Center for Complementary and Alternative Medicine (NCCAM), one of the 27 institutes within the National Institutes of Health, appears to have let him down: It hasn't proven efficacy for any complimentary/alternative medicine (CAM) modality! In fact, he's upset that NCCAM has (apparently) been too busy "disproving things."

Specifically, Harkin said:

One of the purposes of this center was to investigate and validate alternative approaches. Quite frankly, I must say publicly that it has fallen short. It think quite frankly that in this center and in the office previously before it, most of its focus has been on disproving things rather than seeking out and approving.

This statement belies a complete misunderstanding of the purpose and methods of scientific research. Science is not a magic box from which we can pluck corroborating evidence to support our preconceived opinions on a topic! It's a method of testing specific hypotheses; often the result is "your hypothesis is flat wrong."

This statement is related to Harkin's very recent "Integrative Care: A Pathway to a Healthier Nation" session of the Senate Committee on Health, Education, Labor, and Pensions. Harkin invited some of the top names in altmed to pitch their woo at the committee, too. The general gist of the whole meeting is that reform of the American health care system should involve substatially greater "integration" of CAM modalities because they are generally "less expensive and less intrusive." Curious, then, that his complaints about NCCAM were that these modalities--perhaps truly less expensive or intrusive--are also evidently less effective in treating illness?

I sent a message to Sen. Harkin through his website today. I've copied it below (and added some links and formatting that weren't possible in the simple text format of his messaging system):

Dear Senator Harkin,
I find troubling your recent comments regarding complementary and alternative medicine (CAM), health care reform, and National Center for Complementary and Alternative Medicine (NCCAM). Those of us in science and medicine—I am a researcher who hopes to have earned a Ph.D. in neuropharmacology by the end of this summer—have long dealt with (particularly over the last eight years) attacks from conservative/religious ideologues that wish to stifle and distort scientific progress in fields as wide-ranging as stem cell biology, the instruction of evolution in public schools, anthropogenic climate change, and contraception. A common thread of these attacks and others over recent history, generally, is the misuse and abuse of science for ideological gain; the formation of a particular ideological stance was invariably followed by cherry-picking of data to support the pre-determined conclusion with concomitant mischaracterization, suppression, or outright denial of evidence contrary to such assertions.
But such actions are not the sole domain of the political right. Please consider your recent statement regarding NCCAM:
One of the purposes of this center [NCCAM] was to investigate and validate alternative approaches. Quite frankly, I must say publicly that it has fallen short. I think, quite frankly, that in this center and in the office previously before it, most of its focus has been on disproving things rather than seeking out and approving.
Perhaps you mis-spoke, perhaps I'm mistaken in my interpretation in your words, but the quote above, to me, sounds much like the issues discussed above. Your stated goal for NCCAM was to validate (and not, ostensibly, to invalidate), using scientific methodology, the claims of CAM practitioners...Science does not work this way.
Responsible research can only test the hypothesis that any particular intervention will have medical value beyond placebo, using controlled methodologies that counter the natural biases that all humans possess, avoiding the pitfalls of notoriously unreliable data such as anecdotal evidence. Scientific research cannot and should not be used as a tool to seek a preferred outcome: that is, unequivocally, pseudoscience. Notably, NCCAM's work to-date has not demonstrated efficacy for a single CAM paradigm. This is not a failure of science to validate these methods; it is a failure of these methods to demonstrate medical utility. Furthermore, limited and precious science funding should not be used on further testing of failed (and too-often scientifically implausible) hypotheses.
To be disappointed at seeing a hypothesis fail under higher scrutiny is a feeling all-too-common for every scientist, and an understandable reaction. To persist, however, in promoting and institutionalizing un- or dis-proven modalities as “pragmatic alternatives” and to describe modern evidence-based-medicine's eschewal of such practices as “discrimination against alternative health care practices” is beneath dignity, and it emits the same stench as Intelligent Design advocates’ remarkably similar claims.
Whether any particular modality works is scientifically testable; it is medically irresponsible to use any intervention that lacks scientific support. I find it unconscionable that a United States Senator would advocate “reforming” health care by spending taxpayer monies on medical treatments that may sound good but cannot demonstrate clear efficacy. I am not an Iowan, but I’m a concerned American scientist; I strongly back President Obama’s call to restore science to its rightful place.
It’s without doubt that the current American health care system is fraught with inefficiencies and inadequacies, overrun by special interests and rapidly-increasing costs. However, I fail to see what Americans gain by reducing the standard of evidence for medical treatment. This is not reform, it’s a leap backwards.

There is another relevant angle that I didn't address in my letter for the sake of brevity: the cost/benefit analysis of alternative treatments (the apparent thrust of Harkin's argument to more fully "integrate" CAM in the national health care system). I've addressed this at-length in the post below.

In retrospect, I also wish my letter had emphasized the importance of safety as well as efficacy in the evaluation of medical interventions. Relevant safety concerns of an alternative treatment include not only the side effects of that particular treatment, but also whether the recipients of said treatment are less likely to follow recommended care. As an example, this patient refused standard chemotherapy treatments for breast cancer (a diagnosis with a fairly good track record of successful treatment) in favor of "nutritional therapy, yoga, meditation, positive thinking and laughter," dying of cancer 19 months later. (Of course, the chemo could have failed, too, but there's ample evidence that it often works...not so much for yoga.) Furthermore, those more inclined towards CAM treatments often eschew good evidence-based clinical advice and can be mislead by outright quackery into dangerous decisions (such as the anti-vaccination movement, or the 2006 bombshell British homeopaths telling consumers to avoid proven anti-malarial drugs in favor of homeopathic preparations that unequivocally do not work).

There's much to be considered in the re-organization of American health care. I don't think, however, Americans would gain much by placing greater emphasis on ineffective or unproven treatment options.

Cost/Benefit analysis in new or "alternative" medical treatments

2009-03-03T13:50:00.000-05:00

Above, I talked a lot about the efficacy of CAM treatments, but that's only one part of one side of the entire cost-benefit analysis necessary for any medical intervention. Roughly, we can abstractly understand the costs of a treatment as some combination variables representing monetary ($) and time (t) expenses and the likelihood of substantive side effects (SE); the benefit side of the equation is the likelihood of a positive outcome (PO) and the magnitude (m) of that positive change. We'd have to make up numbers to reflect these "variables," but we can understand that a particular intervention's benefit/cost could be understood as treatment value = [PO∙m]/[$+t+SE]
Note that as any of the variables increases or decreases, the "value" of a treatment should correspondingly increase or diminish.

To take this oversimplified algebraic thought-experiments to a more utilitarian level, though, let's consider that most conditions treated by modern medicine have a generally-recognized standard treatment that is appropriate for any particular patient type, usually based on previous research indicating that the standard treatment has some acceptable level of safety and efficacy. Any new modality to treat a condition must be measured against this standard of care. This can be represented as relative treatment value = [(PO*-PO)∙(m*-m)]/[($*-$)+(t*-t)+(SE*-SE)]
where the * represents the variables of the standard treatment option, compared to another modality. What this abstract monstrosity should convey is generally that for a newer treatment to supersede a standard treatment, it needs to demonstrate a superior combination of costs and benefits for responsible medical practitioners to implement it over the tried-and-true.

Let's take this to a real-life example: osteoarthritis of the knee. The standard treatment varies upon the severity of the condition and the patient's health; this can range from over-the-counter anti-inflammatory medicines to (for about 1 in 4 sufferers) surgery option, which also range in complexity from fairly simple arthroscopy to knee replacement. A common CAM treatment for this condition is acupuncture.

NCCAM investigated acupuncture for osteoarthritis of the knee, reporting that patients receiving acupuncture had better pain and function outcomes than those receiving "sham" acupuncture...however, there are a few important caveats: all subjects received "standard care" (including anti-inflammatory medications and opioid pain relievers") during the study, and while they used similar amounts of these treatments at the start, there was no reporting of such use during the trial; the reported significant improvements took 8-14 weeks to manifest (16 total acupuncture treatments by 8 weeks) and averaged, on a subjective 20-point pain scale, a 0.87 point improvement over the sham group; the "sham" procedure had a fair deal of unmasking, revealing a highly statistically significant difference between what "real" and "sham" subjects believed they were receiving; and a substantial number of subjects dropped out of the study, providing questionable control data. Furthermore, subsequent reviews of the total literature indicate that acupuncture and "sham" acupuncture show similar clinically relevant short- and long-term improvements in pain and function compared to "usual care control groups," suggestive of a substantial placebo or expectation effects. (At the least, it's not a good sign for the underlying theoretical basis: that needles at specific points can "unblock" flows of qi, thus curing disease via restoring a "balanced state" of internal yin and yang.)

The best available data on acupuncture for osteoarthritis of the knee indicates that the treatment may or may not have small benefits (as an adjunctive therapy) on the likelihood and magnitude of a positive outcome, is generally considered safe [warning! the general tenets of acupuncture vitalism reject the germ theory of disease! don't trust that those needles are sterile!], but can take a long time to manifest additional improvement and is rather costly: In 2005, my hometown Portland clinics averaged $75 for an initial visit and $56 per follow-up appointment. Plug this into the second equation above, and I don't generally see current information to justify adding acupuncture to the standard therapy for osteoarthritis of the knee; it may be a good choice for those with cash burning a hole in their pockets, but nationwide healthcare reform can probably do without this specific treatment for this specific condition.

Now, naturally, I am not a physician, nor am I a public health policy official, and I'm clearly no mathematical theorist. My analysis of the specific case of acupuncture for osteoarthritis of the knee was probably woefully over-simplified. I'm just a marginally intelligent scientist-like person who pays taxes and has a strong interest in a health care system that maximizes positive outcomes with efficient practices, a process that requires high-quality evidence and prudent choices based upon the evidence over ideology. I'm also not closed-minded: if acupuncture, or any other CAM modality, can reliably demonstrate safety and efficacy for any condition that results in a reasonable outcome of a sober cost/benefit analysis, sign me up! In fact, I imagine the medical community at large would embrace it.

Of course...at that point, it wouldn't be alternative medicine, would it?
Funny how that works.

Oooh, it burns!

2009-02-19T15:16:00.000-05:00

Via Pharyngula: How to respond to requests to debate creationists

Nicholas Gotelli, a professor at the University of Vermont, received a request from a member of the Discovery Institute for a "debate about evolutionary science and intelligent design". Gotelli declined, writing a scathing response that neatly encompasses almost every major problem I have with the warmed-over creation science being peddled as "intelligent design":

Thank you for this interesting and courteous invitation to set up a debate about evolution and creationism (which includes its more recent relabeling as "intelligent design") with a speaker from the Discovery Institute. Your invitation is quite surprising, given the sneering coverage of my recent newspaper editorial that you yourself posted on the Discovery Institute's website.

However, this kind of two-faced dishonesty is what the scientific community has come to expect from the creationists.

Academic debate on controversial topics is fine, but those topics need to have a basis in reality. I would not invite a creationist to a debate on campus for the same reason that I would not invite an alchemist, a flat-earther, an astrologer, a psychic, or a Holocaust revisionist. These ideas have no scientific support, and that is why they have all been discarded by credible scholars. Creationism is in the same category.

Instead of spending time on public debates, why aren't members of your institute publishing their ideas in prominent peer-reviewed journals such as Science, Nature, or the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences? If you want to be taken seriously by scientists and scholars, this is where you need to publish. Academic publishing is an intellectual free market, where ideas that have credible empirical support are carefully and thoroughly explored. Nothing could possibly be more exciting and electrifying to biology than scientific disproof of evolutionary theory or scientific proof of the existence of a god. That would be Nobel Prize winning work, and it would be eagerly published by any of the prominent mainstream journals.

"Conspiracy" is the predictable response by Ben Stein and the frustrated creationists. But conspiracy theories are a joke, because science places a high premium on intellectual honesty and on new empirical studies that overturn previously established principles. Creationism doesn't live up to these standards, so its proponents are relegated to the sidelines, publishing in books, blogs, websites, and obscure journals that don't maintain scientific standards.

Finally, isn't it sort of pathetic that your large, well-funded institute must scrape around, panhandling for a seminar invitation at a little university in northern New England? Practicing scientists receive frequent invitations to speak in science departments around the world, often on controversial and novel topics. If creationists actually published some legitimate science, they would receive such invitations as well.

So, I hope you understand why I am declining your offer. I will wait patiently to read about the work of creationists in the pages of Nature and Science. But until it appears there, it isn't science and doesn't merit an invitation.

In closing, I do want to thank you sincerely for this invitation and for your posting on the Discovery Institute Website. As an evolutionary biologist, I can't tell you what a badge of honor this is. My colleagues will be envious.

Sincerely yours,
Nick Gotelli

P.S. I hope you will forgive me if I do not respond to any further e-mails from you or from the Discovery Institute. This has been entertaining, but it interferes with my research and teaching.

Yeowch!

I agree strongly with Gotelli on a several points. Specifically, and especially, the ascent of a scientific hypothesis is not earned through public debates, but on the preponderance of quality data. Public debates may be in interesting way to get some attention, but ultimately will only serve as a sideshow with no relevance to biological research. Furthermore, the deck is stacked in the favor of creationists from the start: giving an equal floor to ID (a God of the gaps argument with only the apparent trappings of science) and the modern evolutionary synthesis (150 years of convergent support from fields like paleontology, embryology, biochemistry, geology, behavior, and genetics) gives the former a scientific relevance it has not earned. Finally, any scientist worth his or her chops is bound by the evidence and the natural caution of the scientific method to avoid making statements not commissural with the bulk of the evidence; not so for the ideologue creationist, who rarely attempts to make a positive case for their position, focusing instead on perceived weaknesses of evolution, often willfully making claims that mislead or are outright false (Gish Gallop, anyone?).

All that would be bad enough if ID creationism was actually a real scientific hypothesis of any possible merit that just currently lacked evidentiary support. It's not even a scientific hypothesis, and it certainly has no supporting evidence. Intelligent design is simply a pseudoscientific concept, propped up by easily-packaged soundbites (like "irreducible complexity"), designed to be a cultural virus. The Discovery Institute, the main promotional organization of ID, explicitly designed ID to "replace materialistic explanations with the theistic understanding that nature and human beings are created by God...to replace it with a science consonant with Christian and theistic convictions." This is theology. It's theology done poorly, to boot: it makes the Big Guy into a tinkerer of bacterial flagella and mammalian clotting cascades--hardly the majestic words of Genesis.

Heterosexual male geeks of the world...click here.

2009-01-28T17:55:00.000-05:00

No, really. (Though, perhaps not at work...)

Ted Haggard, thy name is Hypocisy

2009-01-26T11:15:00.000-05:00

Disgraced Pastor Ted Haggard:

I think sexuality is confusing and complex...The stereotypical boxes don't work for me. My story's got some gray areas in it.

Wouldn't you know? That sounds suspiciously like what those nasty homo-lovin' inteelecktuals have been saying for a while now: human sexuality is not a dichotomous arrangement, and people move along the sliding scale throughout life. Good for you, Ted, for finally realizing this after a three-year drugged-out homosexual relationship with a prostitute (and, apparently, some fun-n-games with a "young male church volunteer").

What's a real pity is that Haggard hasn't taken back his odious homophobic preaching. Perhaps it's a greater pity that Haggard's epiphany--that stereotyped sexuality is fallacious--will never be absorbed by his former 14,000-member congregation, or the 30 million within his former organization. He's an other, an outsider, an apostate.

By the way...I love the BCS, too!

2009-01-14T11:08:00.000-05:00

Two videos on religion...

2009-01-13T20:08:00.000-05:00

First, a hilarious skewering of some of the crazy Old Testament...

Now, a thoughtful and artsy allegory for coming to terms with the interpretation(s) of such liturgical works...

15 Evolutionary Gems

2009-01-04T17:03:00.000-05:00

Nature has started its 2009 celebration of the legacy of Charles Darwin off well...This year marks the bicentennial of Darwin's birth and the sesquicentennial of the publication of The Origin of Species.

"15 Evolutionary Gems" provides a short lay overview of 15 studies published in Nature over the last decade or so, each evidence supporting the overwhelming scientific consensus that evolution via natural selection has created the panoply of widely divergent organisms that inhabit Earth. It's pretty cool stuff.

3...2...1...

2008-12-30T14:00:00.000-05:00

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Senseless violence claims a Seattle icon

2008-11-10T18:44:00.000-05:00

In Seattle, as in Portland, it rains often.
This year, it's pouring. For Seattle sports fans, it's been dismal. The Mariners (my favorite baseball team) suck. The Seahawks (the only NFL franchise I pay even remote attention to) are a currently a cellar-dwelling 2-7. The Washington Huskies and the Washington State Cougars are arguably the two worst Division 1A teams in college football. The worst: the proud Seattle Supersonics NBA franchise was stolen away to fucking Oklahoma City.

Now the stomach punch: Violence takes iconic Tuba Man
Tuba Man, also known as Edward McMichael, was a Seattle staple. McMichael, bespectacled and usually in some Seussian hat, would play his tuba outside of, essentially, every major sporting event in Seattle. It wasn't always completely in tune (he was outside after all), and some songs don't sound quite right in brass bass, but it was always enjoyable. Tuba Man's tunes would hover over a crowd as it entered before, and exited after, games for those Sonics and Mariners and Seahawks.

My grandparents loved hockey. For years they had season tickets to the Seattle Thunderbirds, the junior hockey team in the Western Hockey League. They always delighted in taking their grandchildren to Thunderbirds games. I've probably been to about 50 Thunderbirds games in my life--far more than my hometown Portland Winterhawks--courtesy of Gramma & Pop-Pop.

I can distinctly remember, even for games a dozen or more years ago, the melodies of classical and popular tunes, in their deep ringing register, drifting through the evening æther.

Edward McMichael was beaten and robbed on October 25. He sustained head injuries that, police say, eventually caused his death days later. Three 15-year-old teenagers have been charged with robbery and assault, and may face harsher charges for McMichael's death, pending the completion of police investigations. Three kids.

I never actually met Tuba Man, enjoying his talents only as a passing pedestrian. But it's clear that the man meant a lot to many in Seattle. For me, reading about his death made me melancholy not only for the tragedy of its circumstances, but it reminded me of just how much I miss my recently-deceased grandparents (has it really been more than 1 1/2 years?) and how much I treasure my days spent with them.

2008 election: my take on the ballot initiatives

2008-10-28T16:03:00.000-04:00

November 4, 2008, is approaching quickly. I've made my mind up on most issues, but have a few lingering tossups. For those still searching for information to help them decide, I'd suggest a site that I just found, Ballotpedia. Here's a rundown of the 2008 ballot measures from Ballotpedia, and here's the state's online voter guide.

In this post, I'm going to analyze some of this year's 12 Oregon ballot measures.

Ballot Measure 54
This is the easiest measure on which to make a decision, and it's kind of a cool story. High school students from Grant High discovered that the Oregon Constitution contained provisions (from 1948) requiring voters to be 21 years old and pass a literacy test before voting in school board elections. The students contacted the Oregon Secretary of State, and eventually the Oregon Legislature drafted this measure based on their concerns.

This provision has been completely ignored and unactionable since the 1971 passing of the 26th amendment of the U.S. Constitution, which lowered the state and federal voting age to 18. Furthermore, Federal court decisions have determined these type of requirements "violate the Equal Protection Clause of the 14th Amendment to the United States Constitution, and Oregon's Attorney General in 1972 held that the requirement is unenforceable." Finally, the literacy test hearkens back to Jim Crow-type laws that contributed to Oregon's history of racially-motivated disenfranchisement via literacy tests and the like as a condition for eligibility to vote, which were prohibited by the federal Voting Rights Act of 1965.

This measure is a technical fix of something broken for 36+ years; it's also an affirmative statement rejecting these relics of a more divisive era. No brainer: VOTE YES!

Ballot Measure 55
This measure is a fix for a problem that has occured during redistricting. During redistricting, the legislative districts in the state are rearranged to even out population representation (and political purposes), but this can result in situations in which districts can be altered such that sitting State Senators and Representatives may end up in wildly different districts than those from which they were elected; in 2001, for example, "one Representative elected in an urban district in the Willamette Valley was assigned to represent a rural district in Central Oregon."

The measure fixes this issue by maintaining old districts until a legislator's term is up, but establishing the new districts for nomination and election purposes. This should prevent a situation in which people are not represented by lawmakers that they never elected. VOTE YES!

Ballot Measure 56
I hate Oregon's "double majority" rule. It's a system that actively rewards nonvoters! Currently, bond measures must pass not only 50% support, but be voted upon by >50% of eligible voters in order to pass. Elections without major state & national races have, historically, very low turnout. The "double majority" requirement has killed 169 measures that achieved sufficient support, but didn't reach the turnout mark. If a story can be related in which a

popular measure easily won a simple majority but the 43 percent turnout doomed it. Just 500 more votes would have provided the "double majority," and even if all 500 of those votes had been "no," the bond still would have passed.

...you know the system is broken. Especially when opponents of a May 2007 police levy "urged others to refrain from voting, because it was easier to kill the measure by lowering voter turnout." The levy was supported by more than 78 percent of voters, but turnout only hit 42 percent and the levy failed.

Folks, if you don't want to support a bond measure, you should have to vote no. Overturn that bullshit. VOTE YES!

Ballot Measure 57 & 61
These two measures are competing directly against each other; Measure 57 has a provision within it that, if 57 & 61 both pass, allows only the measure with greater support to go into law. 61 is a hardline anti-property crime bill that creates mandatory minimum prison sentences for certain theft, identity theft, forgery, drug, and burglary crimes. It would also drastically increase the number of prisoners and amount of spending on law & order. 57 was created by Oregon's legislators as a watered-down option that only doles out mandatory prison time for repeat-offenders and provides additional funding for treatment programs (which 61 does not).

Both measures will come with a hefty price tag. What's interesting here is that a lot of organizations that would oppose 57 if it were on the ballot alone are supporting it in order to keep 61 from going into law. For me, I'm leaning towards the Oregonian's take:

Measure 57: No. This is one of two property crime measures on the ballot that are ill-conceived, poorly crafted and offer wildly expensive answers to the wrong questions. But any voter feeling compelled to vote for one of them should choose this one. It's half as dumb, and half as expensive.
Measure 61: No. This measure authored by Kevin Mannix is a craven assault on your fears. It calls for mandatory minimum sentences for first-time burglars, identification thieves and drug dealers. If passed, the measure might cost as much as $800 million to enforce over the next five years, and more than $1.3 billion in prison construction.

Those are some ginormous price tags. I can't help but be swayed by this, though: "Each dollar spent locking up violent criminals saves about $4.35...each dollar spent locking up property criminals returns far less: about $1.10...locking up drug criminals produces hefty losses: Each dollar spent returns only about 35 cents in value." VOTE NO ON BOTH!

Ballot Measure 58
Does Oregon really need a statute prohibiting English as a Second Language instruction beyond some mandated time? Shall we allow institutionalized xenophobia to potentially hamper the education of children? VOTE NO!

Ballot Measure 59
Most states don't allow deduction of federal income taxes on state income taxes, but Oregon currently allows residents to deduct as much as $5,500 in federal taxes (indexed to rise with cost-of-living). If 59 passes, Oregon will join Alabama, Iowa, and Louisiana as the only states to allow federal income taxes to be fully deductible on state income tax returns. This is a straight-up tax cut; a tax cut that may eliminate almost 9% ($1.3 billion ) of the 2009-2011 state general budget. The state is already in a budget crunch...I see no need to do that in a way that would only substantially benefit those making enough money to be on the hook for well over $5,500 in federal taxes. (A basic online tax calculator suggests that a single person earning ~$37,000 will be in the $5,500 range for federal income tax. This is approximately the median income of an Oregonian.)

A measure that will create a big budget strain with no benefit to about half of the state's tax payers (and relatively insignificant benefit to those not in the top brackets)? VOTE NO!

Ballot Measure 60
This measure would mandate under state law that:

Teacher pay raises and job security shall be based on job performance...pay raises for public school teachers shall be based upon each teacher’s classroom performance and not related or connected to his or her seniority. If a school district reduces its teaching staff, the district shall retain the teachers who are most qualified to teach the specific subjects, which they will be assigned to teach. A determination as to which teacher is most qualified shall be based upon each teacher’s past classroom experience successfully teaching the specific subject(s) or class, as well his or her as academic training in the relevant subject matter.

The bolded terms have deliberately been left undefined and the italics show the main impetus for the measure. I actually kinda like this idea...maybe it's my capitalist bent, but I dislike a system in which an employer is limited in hiring and firing employees because qualifications and performance history can be superseded by seniority.

The main argument against this measure is that opponents assert this will lead to greater emphasis on standardized tests and thus greater "teaching to the test," a claimed byproduct of things like No Child Left Behind. In my opinion, that this measure refuses to define the terms used is a strength, though: "test" appears nowhere in the act. If 60 passes, there appears to be sufficient flexibility in determining "performance" and "qualifications" that don't necessitate more testing. In fact, "past classroom experience successfully teaching the specific subject(s) or class" seems to allow seniority a qualified backdoor in a performance evaluation, as a history of quality teaching is undoubtedly worth consideration.

This measure is strongly opposed by unions in general and the teacher's union in particular. In their general concern, I sense that the unions are likely threatened by the possible weakening of one of their key tactics: instituting a "statute of limitations" on any manageable firing process such that the efforts to remove an underperforming employee of sufficient tenure become increasingly more difficult. I do think it would be best if the unions worked closely with the state to develop methods and metrics to properly evaluate a teacher's performance and quit hanging onto the outdated and counterproductive stance. I do recognize that Measure 60, if it passes, could have some negative effects, though. Perhaps it will increase testing. It will increase costs. I don't like that the language appears to prohibit cost-of-living increases.

I'm with the Oregonian here (in their recommendation against 60): "the current union system neither rewards outstanding performance nor penalizes mediocrity, nor protects promising young teachers during economic downturns."
In the end, Willamette Week captures my feelings: "Putting a stop to raises based largely on seniority could go a long way toward rewarding good teachers—and motivating others to improve" but the "measure is, to borrow a popular saying from Sen. Barack Obama, a meat cleaver when what we need is a scalpel." VOTE NO!

Ballot Measure 62
Divert 15% of Oregon Lottery proceeds to a public safety fund? Why?

Currently, the Oregon legislature is mandated to spend 44 percent of lottery funds on parks, bond payments and an educational reserve fund. The remaining 56 percent of Lottery proceeds are spent on a variety of programs, including K-12 education, and state and local economic development. This measure would reduce funds available for these programs. Under this measure, the legislature may not limit expenditures from the public safety fund. Additionally, the distributions to county district attorneys and sheriffs cannot be used to replace existing funding from other sources.

This shifts money around, from education and such to public safety, and creates greater restrictions on the use of that money. Sounds like it will create more budgetary red tape and funding problems for education...VOTE NO!

Ballot Measure 63
This measure would allow homeowners to avoid buying building permits for work on their own home up to a value of $35,000 each year. The idea here isn't so bad: there probably is plenty of red tape that could be eliminated in the home improvement field...but, as a measure opponent presciently states, "Thirty-five thousand can buy a whole lot of stupid when it comes to working on houses."

I'm not opposed to evaluating the current system for common sense changes that will allow greater freedom for property owners to improve their own land, however, given the safety concerns and insurance requirements relevant to proper permits & inspection, baby steps would be a better approach. VOTE NO!

Ballot Measure 64
Measure 64 is déjà vu all over again: we've voted on the same content in failed 1998 and 2000 initiatives, and similar initiatives failed to qualify for the ballot in '02, '04, and '06. Bill Sizemore really wants to end the use of payroll deduction for "political purposes," a term that includes "candidates, political committee or party, initiative or referendum committee, and supporting/opposing candidates or ballot measures (including signature gathering for petitions)."
One needn't be particularly cynical to note that unions are generally the strongest opponents of whatever Sizemore can get on the ballot, and unions generally collect a substantial portion of their operation funds via voluntary payroll deduction...What's sad, though, is that this initiative would probably have a negative effect on the funding of many non-profit charitable organizations (i.e., Muscular Dystrophy Association, United Way, Parent Teacher Associations, Oregon Humane Society, Oregon Food Bank, etc.) that have political lobbying efforts in their actions. VOTE NO!

Ballot Measure 65
This measure would create a "top two primary " in which the primary for a specific race would have all running candidates and be open to all Oregon voters. The top two vote recipients would be on the final ballot. Those arguing against warn that this will create final ballots in which your choices could only be two Democrats or two Republicans (though I'm skeptical that it will result in many unwarranted cases of this) and that small party candidates will be left out of the final race entirely.

Well, those may be limitations of the proposed system. But the current system sucks. A closed primary means that successful candidates are often more satisfactory for the party's fringe than the moderates, and it only allows one to vote in one's own party primary, completely leaving registered independents (like myself) out of all decision-making. As for third parties...well...improve your messages and get in the top two. VOTE YES!

And don't you forget it...

2008-10-10T12:42:00.001-04:00

"If there's one rule in election-year politics, it's this: Don't mess with the science crowd."

You don't want a piece of this.

Pareidolia + evolution via natural selection

2008-09-21T20:22:00.000-04:00

I've been following this site for about a year now. It's an interesting experiment combining elements of evolutionary theory with pareidolia, the phenomenon through which humans perceive hidden images in random patterns (i.e., bunny rabbits in clouds, faces on the moon or Mars, the Virgin Mary in a grilled cheese sandwich).

The experiment: create pictures with shapes in a random layout. Each viewer rates a given picture (0-10) on its likeness to a given category, such as "face". Subsequent rounds of pictures are created from the previous: images that receive higher scores create the most "offspring" with "mutations" (minor alterations in layout). Over time, the images grow more and more like the prescribed category.

Here's a best-of gallery.

For the "face" category, here's an example of a "before" pic:

and an "after":

Why can't sports video games get it right?

2008-08-26T18:19:00.000-04:00

I'm no hardcore gamer, but I do like to play my Xbox 360--it's a great way for me to relax. My favorite genre of games is typically sports games. Last month, EPSN's Patrick Hruby nailed every sports gamer's general frustrations regarding the features video game developers just haven't been able to capture properly. If you're interested at all in sports video games, you'll surely share his concerns.

SEC, Pac-10, Big Ten, Big 12: Who Is the Best?

2008-08-26T14:49:00.000-04:00

An interesting report was published a little while back regarding the now-constant debate among college football fans regarding the relative strength of the major conferences. In this article at Bleacher Report, the author asks which league--SEC, Pac-10, Big Ten, or Big 12--has placed a greater percentage of teams in the final top-25 polls from 2000 to 2007.

It's a reasonable and simple analysis, and it reveals:

The Pac-10 placed 30 percent of its teams in the Top 25, the Big 12 notched 32 percent, the Big Ten 33 percent, and the SEC led with 41 percent.

Interesting stuff. But I think it lacks nuance. Perhaps I should modify this analysis?I'd argue that the position in the polls is also important, as this analysis equates every #1 with every #25. I propose that a truer measure would be to analyze the relative position as well. Also, the teams of 2000 and the teams of last year are quite a bit removed--I think temporal trends are worth evaluating.

Position can be measured & weighted rather simply...Here's how:

#1 in the polls gets 25 points (and so on to #25 earning 1 point); 25+24+...+2+1=325

The maximum points available each year in each league depends on the number of teams in the league. For example, the 10-team Pac-10 can earn up to 205 total possible poll points each year
Divide total numbers of earned points by total possible points to determine % that accounts for the weighted top-25 results, this is the % of maximum possible poll points

Lather. Rinse. Repeat. What's the comparison then? I'll use the season-ending AP & ESPN/USA Today polls (using the average ranking). The ACC & Big East are more complicated because they swapped some teams around and changed size in 2004 & 2005...I left them in, though.

After far too much work, here's the results...

From 2000-2007, these leagues earned the shown percentage of possible ranking points:

SEC: 28.5%
Big 10: 22.7%
Big 12: 25.5%
Pac-10: 22.7%
ACC: 16.7%
Big East: 19.4%

The raw numbers here won't compare nicely with the Bleacher Report analysis, but let's look at the rank-order.

His: SEC>Big 10>Big 12>Pac-10

Mine: SEC>Big 12>Pac-10=Big 10>Big East>ACC

My paradigm shows the Big 10 & Pac-10 in a dead heat & the Big 12 undervalued by the Bleacher Report analysis. The SEC clearly comes out on top. How about over time?

For the last 4 years, the SEC has dominated in this metric--and it's a conference that appears to be trending upward. I'd buy this, based on the reality that there are a lot of great teams in that conference every year, and currently the league boasts a Who's Who list of college coaches and the last two BCS champs.

The Pac-10 has been fairly steady: never the worst and never the best. Yearly, the recent dominance of USC has been accompanied, almost invariably, by 2 teams in the #10-#20 range. I would bet good money on another year of the same...

It's easy to see how the Big East suffered--notice the fat dip 2003-2005--during the moves of Miami, Virginia Tech, and Boston College to the ACC. (But...it didn't seem to help the ACC much, did it?) While the Big East has regained some strength on the backs strong West Virginia and Louisville squads, the establishment of South Florida and Rutgers as legit top-25 teams, and recent success of Cincinnati and UConn, has given the Big East some (unexpectedly good) clout.

The ACC use to be the Florida State show. Now the Seminoles aren't even good. Virginia Tech has been the only program with any semblance of consistency and national recognition since the realignment. Recent growth by Wake Forest notwithstanding, until Miami and FSU get back to top-dog status, the ACC may continue to slide.

The Big 12 slid for seven straight years, but had a good year in 2007. Will they continue to bounce back? I think that hinges on the re-establishment of traditional North Division power Nebraska...Texas & Oklahoma have been carrying the conference while A&M underachieved, K-State regressed and Colorado's program was rocked by scandal after scandal. Also in play: can Texas Tech finally take that last step up in performance (that is, win all those games they're supposed to win) to become a truly elite team rather than an inconsistent-but-very-good team with ridonkulous Playstation offense numbers?

The performance of the Big 10 has been much-maligned on teh intarwebs the last couple years. I think what my analysis indicates is that the conference has bounced up and down in relative strength. Last-last-first-first-fourth-second-third-fourth. Wha? What's interesting is the difficulty in divining any sort of trend here...

So, let's let the computer do it...

These are the best-fit linear trends of each conference. What jumps out to me is that 4/6 show downward slopes, and the Big 10 isn't one of them! Now, admittedly, this isn't a large sample set--8 years of data in am imperfect metric won't exactly help me earn that Ph.D. I'm supposed to be working on--but perhaps the Big 10 is getting a bum rap; maybe 2002/2003 were plus-side aberrations of a generally improving league?

Nah. I still can't buy it. Right now, Ohio State is the only team that strikes any fear into non-conference foes (September 13 is gonna be huuuge). Michigan is sliding, Wisconsin's success seems a little over-inflated, Minnesota should be relegated to the Mid-American Conference, and Iowa has lost its mojo...

...does this mean I need to go back an collect earlier data for a stronger analysis? I don't know if that's something I wanna do.

One final iteration of this analysis: what about the non-BCS teams? The graph below includes the yearly result (and associated trendline) of the fraction of available points that went to teams outside the six BCS conferences. [This data technically uses a different y-axis (% total points), but I left that info off the already-cluttered graph.]

We can see that non-BCS schools have also been able to increasingly chip away at the number of available ranking points for the big boys. This coincides well with the general feeling that modern college football has much greater parity than ever before.

The fire alarm that cried "Wolf!" (and fucked up my experiments)

2008-08-25T17:50:00.001-04:00

Over the last month or so, my building has had periodic fire alarms. Actually, the alarms have been largely confined to my floor and often only one other...and it's happened, on average, about once a week.

There's never been a fire, or anything close to a fire, as far as I can tell.

I don't know what's causing the damn things, probably the construction on the floor immediately below. Whatever it is, though, it needs to stop.

The alarm went off again today, just about an hour ago. Allow me to share a few observations...

These modern fancy-schmancy alarms are w e i r d. Instead of a really loud buzzer, horn or bell, there's a modestly loud "ding" that doesn't actually ring very often. And it talks. "Attention. Attention. There is an emergency. Please head to the stairwells and exit the building" states a disturbingly calm male voice. I guess the alarm attempts to soothe and relax the masses that might justifiably panic if the biochemistry lab across the hall were to go up in flames with Jebus-knows-what in their fume hoods?

We've had so many recent false alarms that at least half of the residents of my floor did not leave. In an actual emergency that would be a bad thing. Don't you think?

Let's say one is -- hypothetically -- performing an experiment in which one analyzes the behavior of small animals, investigating subtle differences in their interactions with a specific environment. In this thought experiment, the data that would be generated is vital to one's thesis research and necessary for the fancy charts and graphs planned for two upcoming meetings. Furthermore, this hypothetical researcher came in all weekend to prepare said animals for this experiment. HOW PISSED OFF IS THIS...(ahem) hypothetical...RESEARCHER RIGHT NOW?! It's pretty obvious that loud dinging, a strange voice-over and flashing strobes might ever-so-slightly alter the behavior of these animals, right?

Grrrrr.

Here it comes...

2008-08-22T02:13:00.000-04:00

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Humor in scientific publications

2008-07-30T16:04:00.001-04:00

I just ran across a paper that amuses me. In his 1994 article "Are Crystal Structures Predictable?" Italian crystallographer Angelo Gavezzotti provides a light touch...I'll copy the first two paragraphs below:

Are Crystal Structures Predictable?

“No”: by just writing down this concise statement, in what would be the first one-word paper in the chemical literature, one could safely summarize the present state of affairs, earn an honorarium from the American Chemical Society, and do a reasonably good service to his or her own reputation. In the mainstream of academic tradition, one could then concede a “maybe”, or even a conditional “yes”, thus making a good point for discussion; and then, in the mainstream of publication policy tradition, proceed eventually to have his or her papers rejected by referees taking the opposite stand.

Fortunately, there is a rhetorical way out of this predicament, known to medieval philosophers as amplificatio: in plain words it means, when you cannot provide an answer, just rephrase and expand the statement of the question. To this very old trick we will resort in this paper. In fact, the title question is a bit too straightforward and simple-minded; such broad terms as “crystal structure” and “prediction” need be defined in more detail. There are several levels of desirable a priori information on a solid; they will be described by posing a number of typical, more restricted questions, in order of increasing complexity. Organic substances only will be considered.
Gavezzotti A. "Are Crystal Structure Predictable?" Acc. Chem. Res. 1994, 27, 309-314.

The article goes on for a few pages, but I can only read the first; it seemingly turns into a thoughtful expository on the ideas behind, and practical realities of, predicting how a particular chemical structure--that may only exist on paper--will behave in pure form with particular temperature/pressure conditions.

What I love about this is how light-hearted and self-effacing the opening is...scientific writing is overwhelmingly dry and sober. However, most of the scientists I know, in fact, aren't. In those two paragraphs we get a glimpse of personality. Sure, perhaps much of the scientist humor I've been exposed to has been...how you say?...dorky with a dash of lame, but that reality is much better than the perpetuated-all-too-often image of socially-stunted, arrogant, emotionless automatons in white lab coats.

New spam tactic (?)

2008-07-23T16:11:00.000-04:00

Okay, spam email blows.

With that out of the way, spam email is often a source of amusement for me. Sure, "Feltmate" (@genesisit.com.au), I'd love to hear more about this story of yours entitled "Hot chick visits senile grandpa‏"...fascinating!

Still, among the adverts for Rolex knock-offs and the cheapest pharmaceuticals from Bahrain, I've noticed a new trend: spam that purports to be a huge Hollywood story of some sort. My first exposure was a few weeks ago when my spam filter caught one from an address that had about a 0.1% chance of actually being someone I knew; the subject of the story was, I believe, "Will Smith drowns in bathtub" (but it might have been "pool").

Naturally, I was skeptical...but, to determine (exceedingly unlikely) likelihood that this was a valid email from a valid address, and without wanting to open it, I checked out cnn.com. If Will Smith had drowned, it woulda been front page, 70 bajillion point font. No dice. Spam deleted.

Since then, I've received dozens of similar ones. Through the remarkable power of email I've learned that Larry King was "shot dead at home,‏" Mary-Kate Olsen "attacked by killer bees," Madonna "committed suicide," and that a few major film stars have had major rape charges filed.

Sweet Jeebus. I guess if you're going to commit federal crimes with spam, you might as well go balls-to-the-wall with full-on libel, eh?

How does one html code a slap to the forehead?

2008-07-17T15:33:00.000-04:00

What's the opposite of "dress for success"?

Whatever it is, these braniacs have figured it out...

A new campaign slogan for Obama?

2008-07-03T14:10:00.000-04:00

Vote for me, Barack Obama, and force Steven Baldwin to leave the country! That's right...a vote for me is a vote for change: namely shipping the star of such classics as Bio-Dome and The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas to some un-named foreign destination! (Or at least calling his bluff.)

Barack Obama, a Vote For Change in the status of Steven Baldwin's residency in America. Together we can achieve the dreams of our forefathers: getting rid of that sinkhole of mediocrity known as the Baldwin Brothers (except for Alec--he's actually really funny on 30 Rock). Yes, we can!

Mr. Deity

2008-05-02T21:05:00.000-04:00

Holy crap...this stuff is funny. There's a whole series of these, and you need to watch them...now. Episode #1 is below.

Now, there's just a touch of blasphemy-ness, but mostly its irreverent and witty.

The FAQ softens the blow if you think this is just an attack on religion. You can find many episodes on Youtube, but you need to go to Crackle to see season 2.

Party animals

2008-05-01T20:23:00.000-04:00

Sometimes wild animals like to have a little fun...and what's more fun than getting plastered by eating fermenting fruit?

Amusing...

2008-04-30T00:41:00.000-04:00

Caught in my spam filter today was an email with an amusing title:

This is your thingy. This is your thingy on drugs. Any questions?

One question. Thingy? Really? Are 4th graders writing these spam emails?

Lizard evolution on the decade scale

2008-04-23T22:56:00.000-04:00

PZ Meyers has a fascinating post about a recent PNAS journal article that details substantial morphological changes in a lizard species over the course of thirty-odd years.

Ten transplanted Podarcis sicula have populated an island separate from their natural habitat. Since their 1971 relocation, the current P. sicula inhabitants of this second island have developed characteristics that differ wildly from their relatives. It's an exciting look at the process of speciation, on the time-scale of decades.

Expelled exposed...and evicerated!

2008-04-21T20:45:00.000-04:00

I used to kinda like Ben Stein. He, of the quirky persona, monotone voice & Nixon speechwriting credits, was a interesting B-list celebrity that made his mark in Ferris Bueller's Day Off and Win Ben Stein's Money--in the latter he demonstrated that he's a smart guy (as his Columbia economics degree and Yale law degrees would attest).

Now he's gone and done somethin' dumb. Stein is the host of a recently-released documentary: Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed. Expelled tells the story of how mean old Big Science has forced evil Darwinism upon the masses (resulting in society's moral degradation and several specific examples of depravity) whilst intimidating and silencing the humble, well-meaning scientists that just want to offer a modest alternative to the ivory tower dogma of evolution.

Except, that...well...that's a steaming load of horseshit.

Expelled has become, frankly, notorious for its factual inaccuracies, bloated conspiracy theories, underhanded stunts perpetrated by the filmmakers, and remarkably brash assertions that evolutionary theory is to blame for atheism, Communism, Fascism, eugenics, Planned Parenthood, and the atrocities perpetrated by the Nazis.

If the obvious ad hominems above aren't enough...

It's been demolished by movie reviewers, too...even a Fox News writer couldn't believe the jackassery of the film. I like this coverage for its snarkiness.

Perhaps most damning: Chuck Norris liked it!

For an overview of all the lies perpetrated within this film, check out Expelled Exposed, a website by the National Center for Science Education that details the factual inaccuracies used to support the pile of tripe.

**********

One sad thing: the film has already seemingly duped one person. Richard Dawkins explains and responds.

Global warming wants to ruin my life...

2008-04-14T19:08:00.000-04:00

Climate change skeptics may be forced to re-evaluate their position as there was recently news regarding global warming's newest and most terrible consequences: as the world warms, the price of beer makin' ingredients will rise as well.

For the love of God, stop driving your damn Escalades! Papa needs his beer!

Mead Releases New Grad-School-Ruled Notebook

2008-04-08T19:14:00.000-04:00

From The Onion: Mead Releases New Grad-School-Ruled Notebook.

Presidential candidates & science

2008-01-26T23:26:00.000-05:00

For those, like me, that hold the science and technology policy positions of our nation's presidential candidates as an important factor in weighing one's voting options, please check out the AAAS breakdown of the candidates' platforms and statements.

Mad scientists screw with the sexual identities of fruit flies!

2008-01-03T19:03:00.000-05:00

A mutation in the Drosophila gene "genderblind" makes the fruit flies bisexual. No really. (I promise not to make any "fruit" fly jokes...)

I can't imagine the identity crises and social strife the little buggers went through as those twisted maniacs "gave flies drugs to alter synapse strength...[allowing them] to turn fly homosexuality on and off, within hours."

The research is actually quite interesting: the scientists speculate--and believe their data supports the hypothesis--that in fruit flies have parallel competing neural pathways that encode heterosexual or homosexual behavior, and the genderblind genes controls some pheromone-recognition pathway that suppresses the "homosexual circuit".

Beer Blogging: Trader Joe's 2007 Vintage Ale

2007-12-30T23:39:00.000-05:00

It's Belgian Abbey Dubbel-style. It's a once-a-year brew. It's exclusively available at your neighborhood yuppie-Mecca, Trader Joe's.

It's also fairly good, if you like Trappist-style ales.

I picked this up a few days ago as we swung by TJ's for a few items; it was in a prominent display boasting its unique nature as a Trader Joe's original. Hey, $4.99 for 750ml of 9% alcohol Abbey-style beer sounded like a reasonable splurge for me.

It does boast a nice amber color and a thick, sweet foam head. And it's got a strong bubble to it as well. The aroma is subdued for a beer of this style, as it smells flowery and a little bready, but not overwhelmingly cheesy. It's not as sweet as many Trappists brews, and I'm okay with that--sometimes these beers suffer from an overabundance of syrupy sweetness that turns into a swill reminiscent of cough syrup halfway through a glass.

TJ's 2007 has a pleasant forward malt taste that lingers (quite long) into a sweet bitterness that only hints of the "three European hops" noted on the label. The sweetness has a modest banana flavor and is a bit like drinking a dry European pastry. I honestly can't tell if I like the spice included ("for distinctive spices"!); there is a definite note of clove to this beer, and cloves tend to make my tongue go numb to the subtleties of other flavors.

In all, I enjoyed this beer. I am tempted buy another if only to test the statement on the bottle's label that "this ale will age exceptionally over time developing more complex flavor as the years go by." The (current) flavor is weaker than many true Dubbel/Abbey imports, but I actually consider that a good thing: it's crisper and more refreshing, allowing one (me at least) to enjoy the experience longer. I can see myself picking up TJ's 2008 Vintage next winter. Victoria will likely take one sip of that vintage, too, and wrinkle her nose with a "no" just like this year. (She is decidedly not a fan of Belgian-style brews.)

My Score: 8.5
Victoria: 4

Noooo! Beer to be more expensive?!

2007-12-09T16:53:00.000-05:00

According to this article, the price of hops has climbed 400% this year! (Malt doubled in price, too...) Higher demand & poor crops have jacked up the price, and it'll undoubtedly find its way to the pocketbooks of discriminating beer drinkers.

Most beers worth drinking contain a lot more hops per bottle than the swill that gushes out of Coors, Budweiser and Anheuser-Busch factories.

Bah!

The crop requires several growing seasons before it produces a marketable yield, so the market won't bounce back anytime soon. And, because large brewers purchase their supplies in advance through futures contracts, they get first crack at supplies, meaning microbrewers will have to scramble for the leftovers.

Bah! I say!

Revvin' up to the gift exchange...

2007-12-04T16:48:00.000-05:00

We're hosting a white elephant gift exchange in a week and a half...it should be great fun (they always are).

I'll be making my crazy-delicious egg nog, naturally. Gloriously crappy gifts will abound! I've already bought my gift, a disturbing mélange of quasi-pop culture.

If you are looking for any sub-par gift ideas, I'd recommend The Onion A.V. Club's Cheap Toy Round-Up 2007, a delightfully funny romp through dollar stores and clearance shelves. Don't forget to read the comments sections, too...

BCS = Bad College...Stupid

2007-11-30T22:23:00.000-05:00

Stone Smoked Porter

2007-10-20T23:54:00.000-04:00

The folks at Stone Brewing Co. know how to make a good beer. 22oz of their Smoked Porter ain't a bad thing to drink!

The brew is dark, dark brown--practically opaque--with a slightly burnt orange tint. It smells surprisingly faintly, but has a pleasing malty sweetness with hint of caramelized sugar. It's not overly potent (5.9% alcohol--still a good kick), and the taste is mellow and rounded, surprisingly crisp for such a heavy looking beer.

It tastes delicious. It starts off with a sweet maltiness which, after a brief bubble-up of carbonation, gives way to a lingering modest coffee taste that has that hint of caramelized sugar smoke to it.

I like it, and could easily drink more of these in the future...

Me: 9/10

Nerdtastic awesome web fun: the periodic table

2007-10-11T14:15:00.001-04:00

This is a really cool interactive periodic table. The sliders under the properties tab are just plain interesting.

(I found this via Pharyngula.)

Where can I buy a missle silo?

2007-10-10T15:03:00.000-04:00

I could really use one. Just got these, you know, missiles, layin' around. I could certainly use a place to store them...

But where can I find something like that?

I know! I'll check eBay!

Cha-ching!

The Former Larson Air Force Base Complex 1A Titan ICBM Facility is on sale! Score! For the low price of $1,500,000.00 you can get yourself 57 acres ("more or less") of Central Washington, complete with 16 underground buildings including:

3 160' Tall Missile Silo
3 (4 story) Equipment Terminal Bldgs
2 Antenna Silos
100' Diameter Control Dome Bldg.
125' Diameter Power Dome Bldg.

That sounds pretty good...but I wish it had a fortified bomb-proof above-ground bunker.

Wait! NIKE MISSLE [sic] BASE KC-SILO 60 in Johnson County Kansas is on sale, too! And they've got a fortified bomb-proof above-ground bunker, not to mention 16 acres, 50,000+ feet of underground space and 3 water-filled missile magazines...for only $776,000.00

I'd better go talk to my wife before I bid...

Welcome (again)

2007-10-05T17:13:00.000-04:00

Google: northern arizona seacrest porn (somewhere in the USA)

This search deeply disturbs me. Why would anyone look for porn with Ryan Seacrest? Is said porn from Northern Arizona or something? How did I come up? I just don't get it...

Google: fuking libya (somewhere in Libya)

I'm the number one hit for this in the Libyan Google. Sweet. The search links to my post on the Libyan HIV case. It's, thankfully, finally over.

Google: how to write when high on cocaine (San Francisco, CA)

I don't think it's much different. You'll probably go faster and have trouble staying on track and avoiding typos. Seems like a waste of money to spend your cocaine high on writing...plus, drugs are bad and you shouldn't do them. Very bad. And try not to get your coke in the keyboard, it'll just mess things up.

MSN: hotgirs (Gays, IL; Glen Head, NY; Succasunna, NJ)

Two things...First, this is by far the most popular search item bringing random visitors to this site. Second, Are these not three of the funniest city names you've ever seen?

Google: research results regarding flag burning and soldier morale (Erie, CO)

Such research would be interesting. I'd like to think that, even if they don't agree with the message, most soldiers would be proud to state that they fight for the right of everyone to express such political speech, even stupid pinko jackasses.

Google: ball on my eyelid (Dundas, Ontario)

You type well considering your odd predicament.

Google: accidental condom inhalation. (Leeds, UK)

Not like that short-lived fad of intentional condom inhalation...
If you were the person that went to the hospital for this, what would you tell your friends and family? I'd make something the hell up, personally.

Google: most strippers per capita portland (Olympia, WA)

We're number 1! We're number 1! No, really.

Google: names of scientist still alive (Bronx, NY)

You wanna narrow that down some? There's a few of us out there...

Google: blindfold mousetraps (Cincinnati, OH)

Is this a bondage thing? Never mind.

Yahoo: maybe love won't let you down, all of your failures are training (Denver, CO)

I was really confused by this hit...I guess the phrase is from a Rilo Kiley song called "Absence of God." But I think I've blogged enough about failures and being let down to explain being the #5 hit out of ~660,000 for this collection of words.

Google: beerfest quote biologists get it in the genes (Mckeesport, PA)

Biologists, beer, and puns...sounds like fantastic time!

Google: the biggest and the bestest doll games (Frackville, PA)

The bestest? How can I choose?!

Google: rat bastard quals (Raleigh, NC)

Amen! Quals blow!

Google: napoleon dynamite communication theories (Marietta, GA)

Dumbest. Thesis. Ever.

Google: how to buy ticketmaster tickets without freezing (Los Angeles, CA)

Step 1: live in Los Angeles? Seriously, put on a sweatshirt, you'll be fine.

Google: batshit definition (Toronto, Canada)

I'll give it a shot...
batshit (bat-shĭt)
noun
1. defecation from the family of flying mammals found in order Chiroptera
adjective
1. extremely, very much, wildly so (often used in the phrase "batshit crazy")

Google: weapons of mass erection (Bombay, India)

Whatever it is, it ain't Ryan Secrest porn...

PDX pubs' dirty little secret...

2007-10-02T13:54:00.000-04:00

It's rare to find a Portlander that doesn't appreciate a cool, frothy pint of crafted microbrew. It's what we do 'round here, in the microbrewery capitol of the world. In between those quality quaffs, we gulp down copious amounts of hipster-cool Pabst Blue Ribbon and Miller High Life, cause they're cheaper and totally ironic.

But, are you really getting your money's worth when you order a pint of a local über-bitter IPA or a pint of Midwestern swill water?

A pint (here in the US of A) = 16 fluid ounces = 2 cups = ~473ml. (Brits, by the way, boast an Imperial pint of 20 ounces!)

So, how big is that pint glass you just ordered?

Far too often, it's only about 13 ounces...

Read more about this here. And write your local congressman--let's get this fixed!

Delicious Darwinist Dessert!

2007-09-30T16:33:00.000-04:00

From the Best of Craigslist:

Survival Of The Fittest
Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.
Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.
I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.
Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.
When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."
This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion. There can be only one.

I used to do the same thing with every pack of Skittles I bought as a gradeschooler.

Tree hugger heartbreak

2007-09-29T19:27:00.001-04:00

My wife is a big University of Oregon football fan.
She is not happy. Not. At. All.

Oregon lost today, 31-24, to the Cal Bears. UofO's QB, Dennis Dixon, threw two interceptions in the fourth quarter that allowed Cal to take the lead. With time running out, Oregon managed to make a defensive stand, get the ball back and move down the field. However, with just seconds left in the game, wide receiver Cameron Colvin fumbled the ball at the 1 yard line--the ball went through the end zone and out of bounds for a turnover.

She was crushed. Then she was mad.

Her: "Fuck you, Dennis Dixon!"
Her (yelling at the TV in the sports bar when Dixon was shown): "It's all your fault!"
Her (on the way home from the sports bar): "If I were to see Dennis Dixon, if he were to somehow get up here from Eugene in the next few minutes, I would run him over."
Her (at home): "I fucking hate Dennis Dixon..."

Her (to me, after I was chuckling to myself about her reaction): "Well, how would you feel if [USC's QB John David] Booty were to commit two turnovers at the end of the game that caused your team to lose?
Me:"I don't know...but probably not homicidal."
Her (walking into the other room, half under her breath): "Well, you're not a true fan, then..."

It was one hell of an exciting game, but Dennis Dixon, if you happen to be reading this, steer away from Beaverton for awhile, k?

Whirl-winded

2007-09-28T19:29:00.000-04:00

I haven't posted very much over the last few months in particular, and this year in general...in fact my production is a shadow of its former self.

There's a few good reasons I've been too distracted to post my usual mindless blather:

I've never had as much on my plate in terms of scientific work to perform, analyze, and write about. This is good for my career (I assume), but not as good for my leisure pursuits...As my 3rd year of grad school has come to a close and I begin my 4th year, I find myself vitally important to my lab's present success and future funding--my work is largely the crux of our current desperate grant funding applications. No pressure...

I'm a homeowner now! We bought a house, fixed it up, and moved in late July. It's been great, really; it seems so, well, growed up. (Of course, we now owe a giant mortgage firm a few Gs over the next thirty years...) We spent a lot of our free time this spring & summer searching for a home, and then spent way more time drastically redecorating the place that we finally bought. Now, I spend a lot of free time tacklin' that ever-present Honey-Do List. That seriously contributed to a general lack of time & energy to post.
One consequence of the move has been that I probably spend an average of 45 minutes more on mass transit each day than I used to. You don't notice that time 'til it's gone. Sure, it means more time to do read all those science papers I'm supposed to, but it also means almost an hour less time each day to dick around on the interwebs, finding content that amuses me and writing these posts.
My general disposition has taken a lot of hits this year. I've lost all three of my living grandparents in the span of less than a year. These hit me hard, to varying degrees, emotionally and physically. I've lived a life that has not featured a great number of lost loved ones, so this was new and hard. This is compounded by the general increase in work-related stress: I can handle being busy, but the funding worries of our lab have put a heavy burden on my shoulders to produce...not just for my career, mind you, but for the future of the lab and everyone's salaries.

The last thing, and maybe it's a function of various stresses discussed above, but I've lost a bit of the allure I had for using this blog as an outlet for my creativity/weirdness/frustration/humor. For three years, Write Down to a Science has been a lot of fun to run. It hasn't, however, been as successful as I'd hoped in acting as a forum in which lively discussions take root on any and every topic. Indeed, the site doesn't have many readers, just my close friends, really. This is due in large part to my sporadic posting and inconsistent subject matter, I'm sure.

There's really only three ways to go from here: I could continue to post in disparate spurts, close up shop, or make an effort to get back to my semi-regular posting days...

I guess we'll see what happens?

Justice (somewhat, finally) served

2007-08-01T13:01:00.001-04:00

"Libya Frees Condemned Medical Workers"

What a mess. At least it's finally over.

Heh...penis bone.

2007-08-01T12:59:00.000-04:00

What type of blog post is ripe for nerdgasmic comment section double entendres? Why a post ripping on the "genetic mutation" that clearly shows that God used not Adam's rib bone, but the penis bone, in his construction of Eve!

No, you read that right...

Check it out. Some of the comments following the post a quite clever, and there's plenty of snicker-worthy puns and whatnot to enjoy.

I laughed my ass off...

2007-07-07T23:53:00.000-04:00

UPDATE: I just noticed that original video has been taken down...and that story is, in itself, kind of interesting...anywho, there's a new version below.

**********

I found this on Pharyngula...it's a very NSFW (language) music video all about everyone's least favorite evangelist/young earth creationist/fake doctor/convicted tax evasionist/Dinosaur Adventure Land founder and all-around douchebag, Kent Hovind!

Seriously, though, read up on this guy. If anyone deserves a vulgar song like this, it's that jackass.

Bison Chocolate Stout

2007-07-07T00:06:00.000-04:00

What we have here tonight is a very dark stout. It's extra dark and interesting because the beer is brewed with "the addition of fine dutch cocoa in the mash"...I believe it because you really do get a sizable chocolate aroma and flavor. The aroma also has a hint of coffee and a little malt to it.

The taste is unique. It's fairly sweet on the tongue, but it has a lingering bitterness that was initially good but later became a bit overpowering. I'm not a fan of too-strong aftertastes and this beer certainly has one. It's good, but it killed my palette for the evening.

Me: 7.5/10
Victoria: 6/10 -- "too dark for me"

Who doesn't love riding the bus up to Pill Hill?

2007-06-12T15:12:00.000-04:00

From Portland's Best of Craigslist, here's a little memo to all OHSU-bound Trimet Riders.

(I think Chantelle gets props for this link...)

Britney's Guide to Semiconductor Physics

2007-06-11T15:27:00.001-04:00

I don't know what else to tell you other than check out the link and learn all about vertical cavity surface emitting lasers and the like from everyone's favorite teenybopper music sensation!

(This is, mind you, the innocent Britney, not the chubby, trainwreck, married-and-divorced-to-Cletus-McFreeride, cokefiend we all know now...)

Obsidian Stout

2007-06-10T23:26:00.000-04:00

From Deschutes Brewery, the Obsidian Stout is, first and foremost, dark. A backlighted pint glass lets nothing through. And it pours thick, too.

It's heavy on the tongue and the beer's modest bitterness and moderate carbonation hits first. Only long after you swallow does a pleasant malty coffee flavor reveal itself. At 6.4% alcohol, it's strong enough to be worth the time to savor the complexity of the brew...

This isn't a beer for the faint of palate, more stout-y than many can handle, I'm sure.

Mmmm. I'll give it a 9!
Victoria? Not so much: 6.

Mice on drugs!

2007-06-05T15:11:00.000-04:00

This is a neat site: learn the molecular effects on the brain following consumption of various drugs of abuse...in a cartoon-y flash series complete with trippin' rodents.

(Thanks, Abhinav!)

Practical 25 years ago, it's time for the FDA to change its blood donation policy prohibiting gay donors

2007-05-29T01:19:00.000-04:00

It's a relic of a different (though not long-passed) era: homosexual men are not allowed to donate blood to the Red Cross. When this policy was established, it made more sense: homosexual men were by far the most significant population in America that risked carrying HIV and confidence in the methods to test for the virus was weak. Since then, HIV/AIDS has become far more than a gay man/hemophiliac/i.v. drug user disease...and HIV testing has greatly improved. Additionally, the gay community has progressed by leaps and bounds in its efforts to stem the spread of this disease.

Blood supplies seem regularly short in supply nowadays. To prevent blood donations from an entire class of people (officially, the ban applies to any man who has ever had sex with another man since 1977) when all donated blood is tested for HIV (as well as other infectious diseases).

I'm not as quick to call the FDA discriminatory as some others--I understand the desire to err on the side of safety--but it seems like a flat-out ban isn't necessarily appropriate anymore...Arthur Caplan has some good points worth considering...check out his commentary.

The Red Cross is disappointed that the ban was recently upheld by the FDA: see here; the Red Cross, American Association of Blood Banks, and America’s Blood Centers issued an interesting joint statement (here), stating

the current lifetime deferral for men who have had sex with other men is medically and scientifically unwarranted and [we recommend] that deferral criteria be modified and made comparable with criteria for other groups at increased risk for sexual transmission of transfusion-transmitted infections.

I'll be watching this story with interest...

Home sweet home!

2007-05-26T01:52:00.000-04:00

We did it!
We found a house!
We bought it!
Sweet!
I'm overusing exclamatory sentences!
I don't care!
Booyah!

More info soon!

Great Google-y Moogly

2007-05-03T12:04:00.001-04:00

I've demonstrated my own interest in random search engine wackiness (especially those that inexplicably lead to my own site...)

Anyways, check out the wild world of Google search marketing analysis at this hilarious post on Adrienne's blog. People are looking for weird stuff out there. My favorite thing about her post: now she's the top hits for some of the more bizarre entries:

#4 for hamster thongs
#1 for big brests and big pences and viginas
#2 for this oven frys food like a deep fryer but looks like a microwave
#8 for is matt retarded

I love this shit.

Seriously, though...hamster thongs?!

Join me...

2007-05-02T15:39:00.000-04:00

in condemning the world's continued use of the killer chemical Dihydrogen Monoxide.

Online communities

2007-05-01T11:44:00.000-04:00

Bacon!

2007-04-25T01:14:00.000-04:00

A certain friend had a birthday party last weekend. There was a definite theme: bacon.

Why? Said friend has a real thing for salty, smoky strips of pork belly. Additionally, "bacon" is a fun word to say and a surprising source of amusing gifts. In particular, we gifted two wacky bacon-related items: a bacon-scented air freshener & Uncle Oinker's Bacon Mints, quite possibly the most revoltingly horrible tasting product know to man.

In the course of searching for novelty items, we ran across many other amusing bacon bits out there...here's a smattering of particularly unique websites devoted to the piquant porcine product:

Jews for bacon—Deliciously un-kosher humorous apparel
The Bacon Show! All bacon recipes, all the time...
Kevin
Bacon Robots—Tagline: "Because the only thing better than bacon is a hot animatronic lady to cook it for you"
Chicken Fried Bacon
How to make bacon soap, and smell tasty
Apparently, cured meats can cause lung disease...
Bacon buddies—Plush stuffed meats and veggies

Now I'm getting hungry...and I want some bacon. Bacon is, after all, meat candy.

Biochemistry with celebrity stars!

2007-04-15T16:20:00.000-04:00

Pete's Wicked Ale

2007-04-11T00:17:00.000-04:00

I think someone brought a sixer of this over to our place a few months ago...

Pete's Wicked Ale, from Pete's Brewing Co. in Utica, NY, is pretty bold in flavor. It's got a nice red color and a good malty smell.

I noticed it was pretty hoppy at first, but as I drink it down, I lose a lot of that sensation and taste more of the malt. Its bitterness doesn't mix with its sweetness well enough, though, and the aftertaste isn't the best, which costs the brew a few taste points. All-in-all, Wicked Ale is a tasty beverage well-suited to a cool night.

My score: 8/10
Victoria's score: 6/10 (not a fan of hoppy beers)

Invasion of the MySpace slutbots

2007-04-10T13:15:00.000-04:00

The other day I logged into my MySpace page because I had received a comment from a friend. That was cool, it's always nice to get something like that, but I'm just not a big MySpacer.

(My profile is in the pleasantly bland original template with no embedded music or videos! I'm not a big fan of being subjected to your favorite music on an unreadable picture background...we all know those people.)

Anyways, I signed off and went back to work. When I checked my email 10 minutes later I had a half-dozen friend requests. So I logged back in; Here's what I found:

Isn't this ridiculous?

Hmmm...Maria, Danielle, Paige, and Abigail must be sisters or something.

And Melanie looks like she has a great personality.

What is this crap? All six of these requests were made in the span of one minute, a feat that could only be accomplished by a program script or "bot".

Or perhaps Melanie et al. are actually machines disguised as humans, maliciously enticing stupid heterosexual males (and the odd bi-curious female) into their evil whore-machine lairs for who-knows-what...maybe these roboskanks will use humans as an energy source or perhaps as surreptitious collectors of their preferred energy source?

Perhaps I've said too much...I'd better go add Victoria, Melanie, Maria, Danielle, Paige, and Abigail to my friend list so they don't figure out I'm onto them...

Tax time...

2007-04-08T14:15:00.000-04:00

Ugh.

Now, as a public service to all my classmates, below is some information from my parents' CPA on the ambiguous pay setup that we're treated to as grad students.

Here's the mumbo jumbo (from a June 21, 2006, letter, but applicable today):

You asked us to provide you with information related to the taxability of the stipend and scholarship you receive from Oregon Health & Science University. To answer that question we must determine whether or not the monies received as a stipend are eligible for exclusion from income under section 117.

Section 117 allows for monies given as scholarship or fellowship grant to be excluded from income to the extent they are used for qualified educational expenses at a qualified educational institution. Monies must be given under the banner of disinterested generosity and not require any past, present or future services to the grantor. Additionally, the grantor is responsible for determining the amount of scholarship monies attributable to services rendered.

In this particular situation OHSU acting as grantor has made two determinations. First they have determined that the monies paid to you are non-reportable amounts and that they are scholarships. Second, they have determined that none of the scholarship is for services rendered.

Therefore, relying on OHSU, the stipends received would be scholarships in excess of the qualified tuition expenses. These monies should be included as income on your individual return. Furthermore, OHSU has not treated any of the payments as income subject to Social Security taxes and is therefore taking the position that all monies received are not wages and should not be subject to self employment taxes.

You should report this income on Line 7 of your 1040 with a caption reading "SCH" on the dotted line next to the box.

So, there's the dirt. Stupid OHSU, making this complicated just to save on paying taxes...

Trappistes Rochefort 8

2007-04-06T00:29:00.000-04:00

If you're looking for strong beer (in alcohol and flavor), check out the Trappists...The Rochefort 8, imported from Abbaye St-Remy, Belgium, has a lot going on. It's a deep brownish red and smells rather sweet. There's a good malty taste when in the mouth, but the aftertaste ends up too sweet. At 9.2% alcohol, the little 330ml bottle can warm you through.

I happen to like funky, complex beers. This is a brew, however, that I couldn't enjoy very often as it's too heavy and sweet. I actually like the Rochefort 10 (which is ~12% alcohol) better, a beer that I became acquainted with in Dublin.

If you can't handle pungent, sweet, syrupy beers, stick to something else.

My score: first half of the bottle gets a 7/10; the second half falls to 6/10...
Victoria's score: 5/10 ("too dark")

Monty Python's Holy Grail (Ale)

2007-04-05T00:11:00.000-04:00

We're fans of Monty Python, so when we saw this novelty beer in the local New Seasons we had to buy it: Monty Python's Holy Grail Ale, from Black Sheep Brewery. It comes in a full pint bottle and features classic Python illustrations and general nuttiness on the label (the ale is "tempered over burning witches").

The aroma is surprisingly sweet, but the beer is about as half as sweet as the aroma suggests. Actually, there's an unexpected amount of carbonation. The taste is bland to blandly bitter, sadly, with all the good malt & hops flavors steamrolled by the carbonation.

It's drinkable, but it's not great...

My score: 6/10
Victoria's score: 5.5/10

Dumbest anti-evolution argument ever! EVER!!!

2007-04-03T14:08:00.000-04:00

Oh, sweet jeebus. Thanks, Deanne, for passing on this gem. It's amazing how crap like this actually incites a low-level rage within me, and is accompanied by violent fantasies of bashing ignoramuses like this dude over the head with a shovel of reason. And a real shovel, too, just 'cause that would make me feel gooood.

Why am I so perturbed? A most recockulously asinine work of anti-evolution propaganda that proves evolution is false using peanut butter.

glumbert.com - Peanut butter disproves evolution

Excuse me whilst I stab my temple with a butter knife...and allow me to join the chorus of heads banging on tables.

I wanna [hic] drive the [hic] zamboni!

2007-04-03T14:03:00.000-04:00

I've decided that I will one day fulfil my dream of driving a zamboni. And I'm gonna do it in New Jersey.

Why? Because you can get good and hammered before doing it and not get a DWI! Woooo!

Zamboni operator John Peragallo had been charged with drunken driving in 2005 after a fellow employee at the Mennen Sports Arena in Morristown told police the machine was speeding and nearly crashed into the boards.
Police said Peragallo's blood alcohol level was 0.12 percent. A level of 0.08 is considered legally drunk in New Jersey...
Peragallo, 64, testified at his trial that he did drink beer and vodka, but not until after he had groomed the ice. However, he told police he had a shot of Sambuca with his breakfast coffee and two Valium-pills before work.

Sambuca and valium, the breakfast of champions!

Roller coaster ride

2007-04-02T15:36:00.000-04:00

As many of you know, Victoria & I have been actively looking to purchase a home. We've been searching in earnest for only a couple of weeks now, but we've completed every important step to better allow us a chance (loan pre-approval, great agent, etc.).

The home search got particularly busy & exciting last week as we saw 5 home in 2 days. On Friday. there was one place we particularly liked; we even got the warm, fuzzy this-could-be-our-home feeling. We scheduled a second viewing yesterday and left convinced that this was the home for us: adorable, great location, cozy, well within our price range... We made an offer!

We've spent the last 24 hours on pins & needles, waiting to hear back. We submitted a fair offer, but knew we were competing against another offer (of which we've no details).

I just got a call from Ray, our agent, and the owners rejected our offer and went with the other--we'll never know why. Victoria is totally bummed, and I'm disappointed.

Oh well. There's other houses out there...we'll keep searching.

Beer blogging

2007-03-31T00:52:00.000-04:00

I'm totally stealing this from the The Disgruntled Chemist's regular beer blogging...

Tonight, I tried a barleywine for the first time: Hog Heaven barleywine-style ale from Avery Brewing Co. As a barleywine should be, it's a heavy, sweet brew with a high alcohol content (9.2%). The flavor was a bit off, though. It came across as two medicine-y. I did have a bit of a buzz after finishing the bottle, though. I'm okay with that.

All in all, I was underwhelmed, but found it sufficiently palatable to down 1 pint, 6 oz of it...Victoria was not impressed.

My score: 6/10
Victoria's score: 4/10

It's always good to print out directions before you go...

2007-03-30T00:48:00.000-04:00

As I wrote below, I will be heading to Göteborg, Sweden, in a few short months.

Just to make sure I know how to get there, I printed out some directions...Check out step 29.

Instead of Ph.D. research...

2007-03-28T21:11:00.000-04:00

I'm linking to kmac's new blog, http://www.insteadofaphd.blogspot.com/!

Congrats to kmac on her recent successful master's thesis defense. She's off to Ireland (in due time). We'll miss her, but the pain shall be somewhat muted as we follow along her journey. And laugh at pictures of narwhals, the unicorns of the sea.

Candy Mountain

2007-03-12T22:23:00.000-04:00

...Linked it since it's being passed around by everyone I know.

I loves me some magic Liopleurodon.

Travel plans: JAG skal Sverige!

2007-03-06T19:12:00.000-05:00

"JAG skal Sverige" is supposed to mean "I am going to Sweden" in, well, Swedish. I translated it here. Of course, it's entirely possible that I'm writing "SELF husk Sweden!" (the result when I re-translate back into English)...

In any case, regardless of what I've actually written here, on May 28 I will be flying to Göteborg to attend the Dopamine 50 years congress (6MB .pdf file with all the cool info here). This will be a great opportunity to see a new country, network with prominent researchers in my field, learn about exciting and relevant recent research advances, and present my research progress.

The best part: I ain't pain' nothin'. My Tartar Trust Fellowship has covered all the costs (registration, travel, room), with a decent amount left over for food and whatnot.

I'll be in Sweden until June 2.

Things I want to try in Sweden:

Okay, those are tongue-in-cheek. But I will check out as many different-from-the-USA type things as I can. I'm already planning on hitting any available smörgåsbord! And I've already scheduled a tour of Göteborg, and trips to Elfsborg’s Fortress and Marstrand Island.

It's gonna be pretty frickin' sweet.

Random malady of the month

2007-02-26T18:58:00.000-05:00

So, my leg hurts like hell.
Just my left leg. For no particular reason. I can't remember a damned thing that I might have done to my leg to make it so angry.

What makes it weirder: it hurts in my shin, kind of like shin splints. But who the hell gets shin splints without any sort of running and in only one leg?

Now the weirdest part: when I move my leg, especially when I rotate my ankle (as much as I can), there's a waaay bizarre crunchy/poppy/squeaky feeling in my shin. Those that have felt my shin and experienced my discomfort second-hand (Victoria, Christina, Kirsten, among others) have all reacted in aghast disgust. It's pretty freaky.

I went to the student health center today to get it checked out. The doctor was intrigued, saying he'd never seen a case like this (single affected leg, heavy "crepitation"--the crunchy/poppy/squeaky thing), and diagnosed me as having some nasty tendinitis. I have to do daily stretches and just wait for it to get better...

Um...I'm doing this to be a better surgeon...yeah, that's it

2007-02-19T19:41:00.000-05:00

From the L.A. Times, "Video game players make better surgeons, study says."

New research today found that surgeons with the highest scores on "Super Monkey Ball 2," "Stars Wars Racer Revenge" and "Silent Scope" performed best on tests of suturing and laparoscopic surgery.
Doctors who had played video games at least three hours a week sometime in their past worked 27% faster and made 37% fewer errors on the surgical tasks compared to those who had never picked up a game controller, according to the study.

Oh yeah! If my prowess at MarioKart 64 is any indication, I could win a Nobel prize is superbly awesome surgical techniques or something...screw a Ph.D., I'm goin' to med school!

I so want this shirt...

2007-02-02T14:05:00.000-05:00

The responses to the Aqua Teen Hunger Force "Bomb" Scare from the internets are increasingly hilarious.

I want this shirt (design at right):

You can also buy a Mooninite LED sign on eBay...

Watch the press conference the two accused held and the response of the panty-bunched Boston media when the men refused to talk about the case and would only talk about 70s hairstyles.

More and more the nation is piling on the Boston officials' actions in this case. The pieces had been up for several days before this madness occurred. Way to look totally uncool by going batshit about some Lite-Brites, Boston, way to go.

This? Looks like a bomb?

2007-02-01T11:06:00.000-05:00

Apparently, enough like a bomb to cause "repeated bomb scares" around Boston yesterday, prompting "the closure of bridges and a stretch of the Charles River."

Wha?!

The piece on the right, for those who aren't as Adult Swim-savvy, is an LED board in the shape of one of the characters from the gloriously bizarre & funny show Aqua Teen Hunger Force.

The "bombs" were part of a guerrilla marketing campaign, and maybe things weren't done as legal as they could have been (some of them were on private property and such), but this got a little out of control. Apparently, bomb squads were dispatched because "it had a very sinister appearance, ... It had a battery behind it, and wires."

I didn't realize Boston was so lame...

I mean, it's not these haven't been up for weeks in New York City, Los Angeles, Chicago, Atlanta, Seattle, Portland (I saw one...I swear. I think it was on Hwy 26.), Austin, San Francisco, and Philadelphia. Some how none of these cities had a bomb scare.

This is so stupid.

**********

If you're unfamiliar with the characters in question, watch this episode of ATHF:

**********

UPDATE: the two guys who put up the ads have pleaded not guilty to placing hoax devices. Read the article for much more info...

Also, here's a humorous reaction to the events...

Blizzard Man

2007-01-30T20:24:00.001-05:00

The first one is good...

The second one is even better...

No need to be smart when advertising a rave...

2007-01-27T15:41:00.000-05:00

Beer...for dogs...

2007-01-23T16:27:00.000-05:00

As your source for random, beer-related news, I'm under obligation to share this: a pet shop owner from The Netherlands has created a beer for dogs. I've added a little emphasis and some [snide comments] to the story, found here and below.

After a long day hunting, there's nothing like wrapping your paw around a cold bottle of beer. So Terrie Berenden, a pet shop owner in the southern Dutch town of Zelhem, created a beer for her Weimaraners made from beef extract and malt. [It's probably as delicious as it sounds...I bet it still tastes better than Steel Reserve.]
"Once a year we go to Austria to hunt with our dogs, and at the end of the day we sit on the verandah and drink a beer. So we thought, my dog also has earned it," she said.[Honestly, I bet the dog would be happy drinking from the toilet and rolling in poop on your lawn.]
Berenden consigned a local brewery to make and bottle the nonalcoholic beer, branded as Kwispelbier. [Hopefully none of the beef flavor accidentally got in their other, presumably normal beers...] It was introduced to the market last week and advertised it as "a beer for your best friend."
"Kwispel" is the Dutch word for wagging a tail.
The beer is fit for human consumption, Berenden said. But at euro1.65 ($2.14) a bottle, it's about four times more expensive than a Heineken. [Non-alcoholic, beef-flavored and expensive?! Sign me up!]

Scientists & political advocacy

2007-01-23T13:00:00.000-05:00

How did I miss this before? Here's a great letter to the editor from the 17 November 2006 issue of the journal Science:

Why Aren't There More Scientists Advocating for Funding?
The funding outlook for biological sciences in the United States is bleak; success rates are in the single digits for some grant programs at NIH and NSF. Yet, when the Federation of American Societies for Experimental Biology (FASEB) recently sent out a policy alert to its 80,000 members urging support for a congressional measure to increase the NIH budget, only 8000 members responded. Why? The following are a few explanations for this passivity we've heard over the years and why they don't hold up.
Lack of time. Of course, scientists are busy and must do science. However, if every scientist devoted just an hour per month to advocacy, the science funding condition would likely be much improved.
Ignorance. Scientists may not know how to advocate or what to do. Many scientific societies have staff that can help. A little research and a few conversations with them on how to engage in advocacy is all that is needed to get started. Use these resources!
Someone else is doing it. You may think that your personal involvement isn't necessary, since some societies may be engaged. However, there is no substitute for a scientist in a meeting with a legislator. No legislator ignores a constituent. Contacting your legislator should be a regular item on your monthly "To Do" list.
It's too big a job and I'm only one person. The problems of science funding may seem insurmountable. However, the power of a single individual to bring about change has been amply demonstrated throughout history, including by such scientists as Galileo, Charles Darwin, Albert Einstein, and Rachel Carson.
Unfortunately, some scientists feel that politics is less ethical than science, and that politicians are not as smart as they are. Thus, getting involved in politics is a step down for them, both morally and intellectually. If getting involved out of a sense of civic duty is not enough motivation, keep in mind that congressmen control our "purse strings" and, thus, it is in our self-interest to do so.
Politicians won't listen to me. Most legislators don't know many scientists and often will value a meeting with you because of your expertise. One of us had a meeting with a prominent senator that went on for well over an hour (such meetings typically last 10 minutes). The senator's comment at the end of the meeting was very telling: "I rarely have the opportunity to talk with a person like you, Dr. Wells." Thus, don't be intimidated. Most legislators will support science if they know that their constituents care.
I can't afford it. Most federal legislators are in Washington part-time and spend the remainder of their time at their home base. Make that local appointment; it will only cost you a bit of time.
I'm not allowed to advocate. Absolutely false. Publicly funded scientists do not relinquish their rights to free speech. Use your own computer at home and your own time. Scientists do not give up their right to free speech because they receive federal funds.
So what's your excuse? Unfortunately, scientists cannot depend on Congress to adequately fund science. We (biologists, physicists, chemists, mathematicians, etc.) must work together. Alternatively, will you wait to act until your lab is unfunded? Science and our country need us.
Robert D. Wells
Director of the Center for Genome Research
Institute of Biosciences and Technology
Texas A and M University System Health Science Center
Houston, TX

Peter Farnham
Public Affairs Officer
American Society for Biochemistry and Molecular Biology
Rockville Pike, Bethesda MD

...I'm trying to figure out what my excuse has been.

The State of Your Liver the Union

2007-01-23T00:32:00.000-05:00

It's that time again...

Time to break out the State of the Union Drinking Game!

Tomorrow, 9pm Eastern time = 6 o' clock beer time in PDX...it's the only way I can get through listening to a supposedly Yale-educated man say "nukular."

Happy Snow Day, Portland!

2007-01-16T11:33:00.000-05:00

We called him Kevin.

This was a Kahlua snow cone...normally I wouldn't eat snow of this color...

Write Down to a Science

Is that...me? (in a possible, distant future?)

Happy college football day!

Back in the saddle(?)

Spiders. On. Drugs.

Happy Darwin Day!

The clip from Love Line that almost killed me and my wife...

Neural correlates of interspecies perspective taking in the post-mortem Atlantic Salmon: An argument for multiple comparisons correction

The hidden gem in The Office wedding episode

Done.

"Hi...I'm Maurice. I'm an executive by day and a wild man by night..."

History of 19th-Century Oregon

Laurelwood Organic Portland Roast Espresso Stout

College football is coming soon...

I did it...

Sports Meltdowns, Remixed

Alcohol reduces gallstone risk

*Facepalm*: free antibiotics, what could possibly go wrong?

NCCAM and American health care

Cost/Benefit analysis in new or "alternative" medical treatments

Oooh, it burns!

Heterosexual male geeks of the world...click here.

Ted Haggard, thy name is Hypocisy

By the way...I love the BCS, too!

Two videos on religion...

15 Evolutionary Gems

3...2...1...

Senseless violence claims a Seattle icon

2008 election: my take on the ballot initiatives

And don't you forget it...

Pareidolia + evolution via natural selection

Why can't sports video games get it right?

SEC, Pac-10, Big Ten, Big 12: Who Is the Best?

The fire alarm that cried "Wolf!" (and fucked up my experiments)

Here it comes...

Humor in scientific publications

New spam tactic (?)

How does one html code a slap to the forehead?

A new campaign slogan for Obama?

Mr. Deity

Party animals

Amusing...

Lizard evolution on the decade scale

Expelled exposed...and evicerated!

Global warming wants to ruin my life...

Mead Releases New Grad-School-Ruled Notebook

Presidential candidates & science

Mad scientists screw with the sexual identities of fruit flies!

Beer Blogging: Trader Joe's 2007 Vintage Ale

Noooo! Beer to be more expensive?!

Revvin' up to the gift exchange...

BCS = Bad College...Stupid

Stone Smoked Porter

Nerdtastic awesome web fun: the periodic table

Where can I buy a missle silo?

Welcome (again)

PDX pubs' dirty little secret...

Delicious Darwinist Dessert!

Tree hugger heartbreak

Whirl-winded

Justice (somewhat, finally) served

Heh...penis bone.

I laughed my ass off...

Bison Chocolate Stout

Who doesn't love riding the bus up to Pill Hill?

Britney's Guide to Semiconductor Physics

Obsidian Stout

Mice on drugs!

Practical 25 years ago, it's time for the FDA to change its blood donation policy prohibiting gay donors

Home sweet home!

Great Google-y Moogly

Join me...

Online communities

Bacon!

Biochemistry with celebrity stars!

Pete's Wicked Ale

Invasion of the MySpace slutbots

Tax time...

Trappistes Rochefort 8

Monty Python's Holy Grail (Ale)

Facepalm: free antibiotics, what could possibly go wrong?